I have a 32-year-old male friend, who, on the rare occasions when we get together for drinks, looks faintly embarrassed about the way he conceals his genitalia.
When I am around, he only offers a cold beer or occasional assistance with lifting something. It seems that, because of his smallness, he feels uncomfortable showing me around, and perhaps worried about who would judge him less if he suddenly shouted out his erectile button.
I have always found this all a bit weird, and rather makes me wonder how much he actually knows about his own desires, and whether he even realises he’s doing the usual slut-shaming thing.
I don’t suppose it’s super important, but if you had sex with him – and had it with pleasure, of course – then he would be there, ready and able, but it’s just not going to happen. So what is he to do? You could insist he tells you all, but when he looks embarrassed, just don’t say a word. You are going to want a relationship with him, and I suspect you would react badly if he had decided he preferred nothing more than to crawl up your backside.
On the other hand, if he wants a relationship, then perhaps he does not need to hide it to you. Because I’m not sure it’s such a big deal to let your mate know he has an erectile phobia. After all, there are plenty of diseases he could catch from his partner; or it could be the case that he has no idea how good he feels about himself, so what’s the harm?
Not that this guy needs my opinions anyway, but just imagine if he were to come to me for counselling? He would probably say that he is so embarrassed by being so small he couldn’t bear the thought of showing me around, and it would be pretty damaging to his confidence in a relationship.
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